This feels like a very apt title for a post about how I have been moving at Truman's pace in order to help him over come some of his fears about change.
He has a really hard time with transitions. I think this behavior has intensified since Keen was born, probably because the birth of his sibling incited whatever part of him is fundamentally resistant to change.
He loves his brother and does not take any of this out on him, which is wonderful, but he has had a really hard time going places, leaving places, getting dressed, getting undressed, etc.
Moving at kid pace, then turning off the TV for good during the daytime has meant a lot of distractions for me.
Things I used to be able to do rushing Truman along or relying on the TV to entertain him for a while I now have to do with interruptions. I used to think this was a terrible thing and that I needed the concentration to be able to complete a task, but you know, when I stopped making excuses and actually tried to do things interrupted without letting my mind panic about it I found it wasn't so bad.
In time I have gotten used to it.
So I have been distracted, continually, from every task I have been doing.
I have also been distracted from this blog. While I have continued taking pictures of the kids almost every day I have a hard time getting them online. I sit down at the computer and find myself letting my mind wander into my own self motivated distractions on Facebook, reading articles, etc.
Following Truman's distractions has been satisfying. When I really take the time to have no schedule and pause when he wants to it is amazing what we find to do. Nurturing this is helping him with other transitions (Saturday we went to church for what ended up being 3 hours, out to eat, grocery shopping and to another store and Truman was content, helpful, non-combative. He never once had a tantrum, even peeing while out.)
If I look at the clock I am always amazed at how long it takes to do something, but when I stop watching the clock I am always in awe of how much can be done in that time.
These years are few. I see that now that I see Keen growing and think about how it wasn't that long ago that Truman was that small and it won't be that long before Keen is as big as Truman and Truman is even older.
I have to embrace this time now in order to quell the fears every mother has that their children will grow up and leave them, never returning. There is nothing that can come of embracing that fear except keeping mindful of the present and appreciating every moment I have with them while they are my babies.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
EC Files: 7 weeks
Elimination Communication is an ancient practice of attending to a baby by listening to their elimination cues and helping them to pee or poop outside of diapers. EC Files is documentation of this journey with my second son. Find them all here. Learn more about Elimination Communication here.
Today Keen held his pee for 4.5 hours while we were out and through a nap at home. While I remember Truman gaining a lot of bladder control early with EC, it's still surprising. I fully expected a wet diaper, but hurried him to the potty when I realized he hadn't gone.
Last week he out grew the bucket we were using and I bought him his first little potty. It's pepto-bismal pink because my choices were that or a very drab tan. It's like a baby bjorn little potty but a strange knock-off found at Kmart. The baby bjorn little potty was nowhere to be found and I didn't want another big one or the two-piece one.
I opted for simple.
Truman is still very attached to his baby bjorn big potty but I figure that by the time Keen outgrows this one his brother will likely relent.
Around 6 weeks he started transitioning from pooping every time he peed to pooping multiple times a day coinciding with me realizing that broccoli was not his friend.
He still cues by kicking and sounds and the poop face and arm movements still accompany poops.
He still sleeps diaperless on prefolds, snuggled next to me.
Today I am finding that he is able to pee without waking fully, which is a skill that will helps us nighttime EC and during naps.
Truman did well being taken to the potty at night for a long time, though now we are having nighttime misses that I think are more related to a physiological change in him at 3 than other things.
The change in our family has caused him a few regressions and I think this is one of them.
Perhaps he is learning to love another as we are and that growth in love is distracting him from the potty in the way crawling, walking or teething did when he was young.
Emotional growth can be just as affecting to children as physical even if it is harder for us to see.
I am loving prefolds and covers and am not sure I will want to go back to the Bum Genius diapers we have.
Somehow when he is in a diaper we are both more aware and able to communicate so I keep him in a diaper a lot. I like fitteds with no covers, but we only have a few of those and it is not that hard to put a cover on a prefold.
We have had success out as we did with Truman but the noises of the bathroom, especially flushing, scare him.
I sing to him to sooth him. At first Death Cab for Cutie's Bixby Canyon Bridge was a cue for pooping, now I sing that or this lovely song, often replacing negrito with other phrases that fit to keep it fresh and because I always feel weird calling my very light-skinned child negrito.
These songs are also our lullabies and he does not seem to eliminate while being rocked to sleep. I think he knows they are soothing songs.
He is very soothed by the sound of our voices singing.
He likes to eliminate in the sink because he can look in the mirror. We study each others faces and smile at one another. He is very aware of us and connected.
Today Keen held his pee for 4.5 hours while we were out and through a nap at home. While I remember Truman gaining a lot of bladder control early with EC, it's still surprising. I fully expected a wet diaper, but hurried him to the potty when I realized he hadn't gone.
Last week he out grew the bucket we were using and I bought him his first little potty. It's pepto-bismal pink because my choices were that or a very drab tan. It's like a baby bjorn little potty but a strange knock-off found at Kmart. The baby bjorn little potty was nowhere to be found and I didn't want another big one or the two-piece one.
I opted for simple.
Truman is still very attached to his baby bjorn big potty but I figure that by the time Keen outgrows this one his brother will likely relent.
Around 6 weeks he started transitioning from pooping every time he peed to pooping multiple times a day coinciding with me realizing that broccoli was not his friend.
He still cues by kicking and sounds and the poop face and arm movements still accompany poops.
He still sleeps diaperless on prefolds, snuggled next to me.
Today I am finding that he is able to pee without waking fully, which is a skill that will helps us nighttime EC and during naps.
Truman did well being taken to the potty at night for a long time, though now we are having nighttime misses that I think are more related to a physiological change in him at 3 than other things.
The change in our family has caused him a few regressions and I think this is one of them.
Perhaps he is learning to love another as we are and that growth in love is distracting him from the potty in the way crawling, walking or teething did when he was young.
Emotional growth can be just as affecting to children as physical even if it is harder for us to see.
I am loving prefolds and covers and am not sure I will want to go back to the Bum Genius diapers we have.
Somehow when he is in a diaper we are both more aware and able to communicate so I keep him in a diaper a lot. I like fitteds with no covers, but we only have a few of those and it is not that hard to put a cover on a prefold.
We have had success out as we did with Truman but the noises of the bathroom, especially flushing, scare him.
I sing to him to sooth him. At first Death Cab for Cutie's Bixby Canyon Bridge was a cue for pooping, now I sing that or this lovely song, often replacing negrito with other phrases that fit to keep it fresh and because I always feel weird calling my very light-skinned child negrito.
These songs are also our lullabies and he does not seem to eliminate while being rocked to sleep. I think he knows they are soothing songs.
He is very soothed by the sound of our voices singing.
He likes to eliminate in the sink because he can look in the mirror. We study each others faces and smile at one another. He is very aware of us and connected.
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