PPC: Marching to the beat of his own drum

(at the Princeton parade. Today he was wearing his rainbow monkey hat.)

Joe was playing softball well into the night in Freeport (a land far far away) so I decided to take Truman to the Milaca parade which goes by Joe's office.

I knew we would have his office as a home base and friends to help.

He was hanging out with other kids, sitting, watching, laughing until several marching bands went by and he decided he, too, would like to be in a marching band.

This wasn't the type of decision that warranted an announcement, he simply took a dum-dum, a new trusty flashlight he has not separated from since discovering it last night at Menards and started walking to the beat of his own drum.

Did I mention he was walking IN the parade?

I tried to contain him. I asked him to stay. I said he could drum here.

But t here was no stopping him (aside from explicit physical entrapment, which, really, never ends well).

So, I shrugged it off and thought, what's the harm in following him.

We walked the whole length of the parade route that was left drumming along.

Maybe some parents would have felt embarrassment -- either because they were in the parade or because they couldn't control their child. Or maybe that is just what I think "normal" parents would think.

But I smiled the whole way. I felt a sense of pride knowing that my son is so willful and exuberant that he was willing to just join in a parade.

After a while floats threw candy, which he collected, then gave to kids along his route.

People smiled and someone said he was the cutest float in the parade.

This could have ended badly, with me dragging him to the car screaming that he wanted to go in the parade, but I suspended all in-grained training of what is "supposed to be" and listened to my instincts about what is really okay and what was motivating my child and went with it.

The gift for doing this for my child is clear, but there was a gift for me, as well. I got to see a pure glimpse of my son in all his glory with all of his outstanding characteristic shining the way they are meant to.

PPC day?: Distractions

This feels like a very apt title for a post about how I have been moving at Truman's pace in order to help him over come some of his fears about change.

He has a really hard time with transitions. I think this behavior has intensified since Keen was born, probably because the birth of his sibling incited whatever part of him is fundamentally resistant to change.

He loves his brother and does not take any of this out on him, which is wonderful, but he has had a really hard time going places, leaving places, getting dressed, getting undressed, etc.

Moving at kid pace, then turning off the TV for good during the daytime has meant a lot of distractions for me.

Things I used to be able to do rushing Truman along or relying on the TV to entertain him for a while I now have to do with interruptions. I used to think this was a terrible thing and that I needed the concentration to be able to complete a task, but you know, when I stopped making excuses and actually tried to do things interrupted without letting my mind panic about it I found it wasn't so bad.

In time I have gotten used to it.

So I have been distracted, continually, from every task I have been doing.

I have also been distracted from this blog. While I have continued taking pictures of the kids almost every day I have a hard time getting them online. I sit down at the computer and find myself letting my mind wander into my own self motivated distractions on Facebook, reading articles, etc.

Following Truman's distractions has been satisfying. When I really take the time to have no schedule and pause when he wants to it is amazing what we find to do. Nurturing this is helping him with other transitions (Saturday we went to church for what ended up being 3 hours, out to eat, grocery shopping and to another store and Truman was content, helpful, non-combative. He never once had a tantrum, even peeing while out.)

If I look at the clock I am always amazed at how long it takes to do something, but when I stop watching the clock I am always in awe of how much can be done in that time.

These years are few. I see that now that I see Keen growing and think about how it wasn't that long ago that Truman was that small and it won't be that long before Keen is as big as Truman and Truman is even older.

I have to embrace this time now in order to quell the fears every mother has that their children will grow up and leave them, never returning. There is nothing that can come of embracing that fear except keeping mindful of the present and appreciating every moment I have with them while they are my babies.

This Week in Facebook

New feature!

I post day-to-day blurbs about the kids on Facebook but it always bugs me that I don't have an easy way to look back at those memories, so, I will round them up every week and post them here for posterity and future embarrassment.

Okay, I don't WANT to embarrass them but I am sure it will happen:

April 28: Truman decided to go into his own room to go to bed tonight. He is on a camping mat under the glow of his nightlights, with a pair of sunglasses and a flashlight hopefully falling asleep right now. He's growing up.

April 27: Brooke Walsh wonders what is the etymology of Truman's new word, "coocoobuya!"

April 26: Breakfast done; baby asleep; time to get these kids dressed and head to the Y for yoga. I have one hour. The goal is to make it there in a peaceful enough manner that I do not need the yoga simply to ameliorate the getting there adventure. Isn't that always the goal?

We did it. Getting there was relatively easy. I was late but Keen slept the whole time, Truman had fun and my mind is less permeable to whining.

April 25: Do you ever send intentionally vague emails to your spouse about inside jokes hoping they get it? These usually consist of a subject heading clue and link. Will he discover the joke or just think I am nuts? Find out ...

By which I meant this.

Joseph J Walsh Ah, McVitie. You're a first-rate jerk. But you make-a the good digestive cookie. And, apparently, biscuit cakes for royal weddings.

April 24: Happy Easter! Wish me luck in church. I am earning my take-two-kids-to-church-by-myself merit badge.

Joe is singing.

It was pretty good. Getting there involved a few tough moments but we did it. Happy Easter to all!

Joseph J Walsh discovered together with Brooke Walsh that my son has five levels of consciousness today: 1. awake; 2. tired; 3. over-tired 4. over-over-tired 5. "I'm a kitty. Meow."

April 22: Happy Earth Day!